


It wasn't like a rain it was more like a sea

by downlookingup



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Catfishing, F/M, One Shot, Online Dating, Originally Posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-28
Updated: 2017-08-28
Packaged: 2018-12-20 12:47:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11921238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/downlookingup/pseuds/downlookingup
Summary: Jaime doesn't know this girl who's kissing him in the club, but he's gonna run with it.





	It wasn't like a rain it was more like a sea

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Evayna](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evayna/gifts).



> On Tumblr, Evayna requested "you thought i was someone else and started making out with me at a club and you’re really hot so i just went with it and now we’re heading back to your place and idk how to break it to you".

One minute, Jaime was standing next to the bar, wondering where Tyrion had run off to. The next, he was being unceremoniously shoved against a wall, and a girl was kissing him. 

_Well, okay._ Of all the things he’d been expecting when Tyrion forced him to come to this club, being kissed by a seemingly sober stranger was not one of them. He put his hands on her shoulders, ready to push her away, but she was kissing him with the methodical thoroughness of someone who had done this rarely and was determined to do it right. And she was. Jaime felt the urge to kiss her back and didn’t fight it.

He nibbled at her plump lower lip, drawing a moan from her that he felt deep in his chest. His hands traveled down her back—strong and broad, a swimmer’s back—and further down to her pert bottom. He gave it a squeeze with both hands, and she broke the kiss, panting.

When she pulled away, Jaime finally got a good look at her face. She wasn’t exactly pretty—her mouth and nose were too broad for her face—but there was something charming about the splash of freckles all over her face, neck, and arms. And her eyes… He’d never seen anything like them. Wide and blue, they seemed to sparkle like galaxies in the strobe lights. 

Jaime smirked at her. “Hi, there.”

She blushed, and Jaime decided he liked how it looked on her. Her mouth was swollen, her lipstick smeared, and he decided he liked that too.

“I’m Brienne,” she said. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Walder.”

The smile froze on Jaime’s face. _Walder?_ Did he even _look_ like a Walder? He opened his mouth to point out her mistake, but she spoke first.

“I was worried I wouldn’t find you. I mean, this whole situation is pretty unusual, wouldn’t you say?”

Jaime nodded. “I _would_ say.”

“I even thought… that it might be a prank or something.” Her face—her eyes!—were so earnest and vulnerable, he didn’t have the heart to tell her who he really was.

“Nope, not a prank,” he said. “It’s just me, Walder, in the flesh. Drink?”

Several drinks followed, and Jaime almost forgot he was supposed to be pretending to be someone else. They sat at the bar and talked and talked, and if anything he said contradicted what she knew about this Walder guy, she didn’t let on. They argued over their favorite TV show, bonded over their shared loathing of the newly elected president, and kissed some more, and by the time the clock struck 2 a.m., all Jaime could think about was taking Brienne home and seeing if her breasts were as freckled as her face.

“Do you wanna come over to my place?” he asked, his lips brushing her ear.

Brienne gaped at him, her hand wrapped around his thigh, dangerously close to where he _really_ wanted it, and nodded.

The cab ride was too short and far too long. They practically ran up the stairs to his third-floor apartment. Once he’d managed to get the door open—no easy task considering how her hands were all over him—he ushered her inside and pushed her against the door, grinding against her and breathing hard against her neck.

And then she moaned, “Oh, Walder.”

 _Fuck_. 

Jaime’s erection wilted. 

“About that…” He stepped away from her, to give them both room to breathe.

Brienne’s eyebrows knitted together. She straightened her clothing self-consciously and ran a hand through her mussed blonde hair. “Is something wrong?”

Jaime took a deep breath. _Like ripping off a bandage_. “I’m not Walder.”

She stared at him blankly. “You—what?”

“My name’s Jaime. I don’t know who this Walder person is.”

Brienne stepped away from the door with a gasp, putting the coffee table between them. Her hands shook as she searched in her purse and took out her phone. After a few taps, she held it out to him.

It was a dating app and, yup, that was a photo of him, probably stolen from Tyrion’s social media. the profile said, “Walder, 35”.

“That’s not you?” she demanded.

“That’s me in the photo, but I didn’t post this. I don’t do online dating.”

She snatched the phone from his hand and put it away. “Great. Just great,” she muttered. “And were you gonna wait until tomorrow morning to tell me? ‘Thanks for the fuck, by the way I’m a total fucking stranger’?”

“I’m telling you now!”

“Who put you up to this?” Brienne stalked over to him, getting right in his face, and for the first time, Jaime realized she wasn’t wearing heels. She was just _that_ tall. His boner revived momentarily. “Was it Ron? Hyle? Who was it?”

“You’re the one who came up to me and started kissing me! Maybe _you’re_ playing a prank on _me_.”

Brienne scoffed. “Yeah, right. Well, thank you, _Jaime_ , for the most humiliating night of my life. I’m going home.”

She moved towards the door, but Jaime grabbed her arm. He couldn’t just let her leave. “Give me your number first. Or take mine.”

Her look was one of utter confusion and rage. “ _What?_ ”

“I don’t know about you, but I had a really great time tonight.” It was true. Apart from the mind-blowing makeout sessions, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun with someone who wasn’t his brother. He wanted to get to know her better, in all the ways that counted.

Brienne scowled at him. “Fuck you,” she spat, pushing him aside and running out the door.

Jaime showered and dressed for bed in a stupor. Besides her name, he knew next to nothing about Brienne and had no idea how to track her down. He would never see her again. Jaime didn’t know why that made him so sad.

When he plugged his phone in on the nightstand, an idea came to him, a flash of divine inspiration.

He purchased the app in the store and swiped left until he fell asleep.


End file.
